Dear Vivienne

[Vivienne Vaisey]

Dear Zaira,

Aww, you shouldn't have. Why didn't you send a search-and-rescue for me, then? Just leaving me alone to be ravaged by wild tigers. And yes, they probably were gossiping about me, my grandma was teasing me after that they think I've put on weight. Which is not the nicest thing to tell a self-conscious girl, by the way.

Yes, yes, I'm happy you're nodding. I did wonder exactly what that odd sticky patch was at the very top of the letter. It's like you've wiped your sticky fingers on the parchment while you were folding it into the envelope or something.

I don't even look at fit Quidd No promises will be made. I don't exactly know the marital status of Quidditch players, you know.

(Yes, I think I left the old letters at home oops. We'll just continue to write in brackets, shall we?)

Oh Merlin, why would you be interested in what I wore to the pool? If you must know, it wasn't a bikini (my grandma would have a heart attack) and I most certainly was not nude. Why are you even imagining such a horror?

I figured as much, hence I decided to send Peaches again Ugh, great, I've got another mum on my tail. Thanks, Z. If I send sweets for her, d'you think she'll forgive me?


Love,
V x

[Zaira Zabini]

Deer Vivienne,

I don't know which Indian authorities I'm supposed to contact for that kind of thing. I hardly know what to do in the event of an emergency in my own country, let alone abroad. Have you put on weight though? Kidding! I'm sure you haven't. Not very nice old people, are they?

That might have been precisely what I did. Sorry. I will try to be more careful with this one. I'm not eating anything so we're already off to a good start.

For a moment I was genuinely confused at the crossed out part. But are you trying to tell me you don't enjoy staring at young men's bodies? Don't tell me you're.... you know. Well, it's alright. At least we can look. (Unless you were trying to tell me you don't like looking but in that case I don't know what to tell you.)

(I suppose?)

If it wasn't a bikini I'm just wondering what sort of offensive outfit you possibly could have worn. Would your grandmother prefer you went out in a wetsuit? 

Excellent. He likes biscuits. Don't tell Mum I've been feeding him. Hm, she might forgive you if the sweets are nice enough. Honestly she'll probably forget you were the one who's been sending the devil bird. Or... no she won't, sweets will do. 

Love,

Zaira

[Vivienne Vaisey]

Dear Zaira,

Not a drop of effort, Z. I'm insulted. Is our love really that inconsequential (big word!) to you? Maybe I will go off and get eaten by wild tigers. And ugh, yes I have. It's horrible. I'm going to need to cut down on the carbs and sugar when we get back to Hogwarts. They're not particularly nice, no. Today's agenda was about marriage, all started by my dear, dear grandmother telling them I had no boyfriend and looked not to be interested.

Aww, I feel bad. And I sort of miss the stickiness. Here's more sweets. I hid them when my grandmother gave them to me, I didn't feel like eating any more ugh.

No, I absolutely do not! Egads. And no, I'm not... gay? You're asking me if I'm gay, right? If you are, I'm not. I'm just not interested, I guess? You can look, I'm fine watching the game haha.

(Brilliant! We can call it our Bracket Mission.)

Probably haha. But no, I just had a singlet and board shorts. Nothing too offensive for you, I hope.

Okay, additional sweets for your mother dear. (And I may or may not have included biscuits for your darling Peaches.)


Love,
V x

[Zaira Zabini]

Dear Vivienne,

Our love is very consequential. My lack of knowledge about the Indian emergency protocols doesn't effect my feelings for you. I don't know if you'd taste very good, just a thought. Especially if you're going to diet. I'm not sure a tiger would want to eat you then. Well, at least your family lets you have boyfriends. My dad said I couldn't date until I was of age. I'm fairly sure he was joking. I hope he was joking.

There are too many sweets with this letter. Merlin, woman. I humbly accept all of them and I will be hoarding them for years to come. These will last me through the coming winter.

Okay, okay. Not interested then. I'll be interested for you.

(What exactly does one do on a Bracket Mission?)

Totally offensive. Young ladies should leave the house with absolutely nothing but the inoffensive skin of their nose showing. Everything else is scandalous.

Thank you, thank you. My mother is appeased for now. She didn't even say anything when Peaches knocked over the sugar bowl. (He says thanks as well.)

Love,
Zaira

[Vivienne Vaisey]

Dear Zaira,

I see how this is. But you didn't even seem ruffled or concerned whatsoever, just a very casual "oh, thought you were eaten by tigers or something", as if I'm of no importance in your life. And ha de ha, what wonderful encouragement; I might diet just so a tiger wouldn't want to eat me. Who says my family lets me have a boyfriend? Well, maybe my parents, but my dear grandparents aren't super cool with it. It's like damned if you do, damned if you don't. Oooh, got a secret admirer, eh?

They weren't all for you, by the way!

Brilliant, that's sorted. I'll have a scrounge around to see if they've got a timetable for practices and games for British Quidditch teams here.

(Simply continue executing the Bracket Mission by writing in brackets.)

Absolutely. I had to wait until all the males were preoccupied and taken out of the house before being able to take a scandalous dip in the swimming pool in our own backyard.

Please, please keep Peaches out of trouble. There are only so many sweets I can send to appease your mother. She might catch on that I'm paying her in sweets to keep her from being mad at me.


Love,
V x

[Zaira Zabini]

Dear Vivienne,

Since you are determined to reject my feelings, I fear I will have to take them back. Sorry. I am glad, though, that I am inspiring you through fear. That has always been my goal. If your grandmother doesn't want you to have a boyfriend then why did decide she needed to tell everyone you didn't have one? That's odd. At least your parents are cool with potentially letting you date. No, no secret admirers for me. I wish.

I know, I know. They will still last me the winter.

Alright, cool. If I knew where to find such a thing I would owl you one.

(Mission is running smoothly.)

You've got a swimming pool there? That's well posh. I suppose it's hot enough. I'm sure one in my garden would freeze over.

He's been very good lately. It helps that he's been showing up at my window rather than the one in the kitchen. Much less of a fuss to let him sit on my bedposts rather than my mother's antique whatevers.

When are you coming back? We should hang out soon.

Love,

Zaira

[Vivienne Vaisey]

Dear Zaira,

See, if you really loved me, you'd take them back, but clearly your love for me only lasts for as long as I am in the country, which is rather depressing. Please please, you're inspiring me through rejection. You refuse to care for me should a tiger eat me, so I'll have to ensure that a tiger doesn't eat me. And because my grandmother dearest is like that? She'll be changing her tune in a couple of years though, regardless of if I'll have a boyfriend or not by then. She'll probably change the topic from husband to children. I think she's keen on seeing five generations of the family so she can accomplish teasing four generations of children about marriage and having kids.

Yes, you are all mine. But really, why not? Is everyone in your year really that stupid that they can't see the beauty that rests serenely in their midst, like a diamond awaiting to be found? They have a lot of lyrical poems here. In the native language, of course, but jeeze they're so cheesy. Pretty, beautiful, even rapturous, but cheesy.

(Brilliant! Shall we call a meeting for the mission once I return to the UK? We can have tea.)

I think it's only my grandmother who has one in her circle of friends, as they always bring their variety of children along and let them be entertained by the pool while they gossip about and matchmake merrily said children. I'm sure if you cast some sort of charm on it, it'll stay warm!

Nice to hear! At least I won't have to send more sweets to keep your mother happy. I think my grandmother is starting to think I've got an obsession with those sweets, considering the amount I take to send to you and your mother. But no worries, I shall be returning home soon (I've got my Portkey booked for this coming Saturday, which is in three days) and then you shan't need to send Peaches for mail again.

I guess we can hang out sometime during next week? I'm required to save a damsel in boredom.


Love,
V x

[Zaira Zabini]

Dear Vivienne,

Well I can't very well love you if you're off seeing the world now, can I? It's much more humane that I let you go so you are free to mingle with the local boys. And not get eaten by tigers. Don't do that. Ugh, a husband and kids sounds... incredibly boring right now. Hopefully she doesn't start on that until much, much later.

I suppose they are. Or it might be me who's incredibly dense. I don't know. I guess we will see in coming year, eh? And yes... that is very cheesy. I guess it's pretty? Dunno, not much into poetry. If someone said that to me and they were being serious... well, I'd probably laugh, honestly.

(Yes. I will hold you to that.)

True, true, I could, in theory, have a swimming pool and prevent it from freezing over. I couldn't control the weather though. So I might very well end up swimming in a warm pool in the rain. I don't know how pleasant that would be, but it sounds like an option if I ever get the urge for my own pool. Your grandma takes pleasure in the oddest things in life.

Brilliant! I will not sleep until you've returned. I'm gutted though that this is my last meeting with Peaches. I will miss him. Please tell whoever owns him to give him some biscuits from me. I will remember him fondly.

Yes, let me know and I will be there.

Love,

Zaira

[Vivienne Vaisey]

Dear Zaira,

How terrible. I'd have thought your love would last longer than a few letters - a few letters!. I was expecting, I don't know, maybe a lifetime. My heart is torn into pieces at your words. Although, I'll try my hardest to not get eaten by tigers. And as for my dear grandmother, I think I'm just letting her roll. I think I'd rather her talk about husbands and children than about how fat I'm getting.

Well, then. I guess they'll be blinded by when you do come out because really, anyone who doesn't ask you out is just thickheaded or intimidated by your endless beauty. I should really stop with these poems, shouldn't I? They're decidedly not who I am. But they're a bit funny, I think I'll do it for the laughs. Because I so love making you laugh, my dearest Zaira, light of my life and beloved of the stars.

(Awesome, shall we talk about the date and location of our covert meeting?)

You could have a tent, possibly? Or even a proper building over the pool, it shouldn't be too hard to make. And you can have Peaches, if you like. I don't think anyone here is too keen on having big birds flying about delivering mail - I think that's a decidedly British magic thing to do. I think they're using smaller birds here, if they are. Like, birds that are common and aren't too easily noticeable.

Where should we meet and when? Mother dearest is too busy at the shop to notice I'm even home, and my sisters are too engrossed in their own activities. Father is going to check out a team who's offered him a coaching position so I might tag along, but otherwise I'm free any time, so just let me know.


Love,
V x

[Zaira Zabini]

Dear Vivienne,

Ah, well, you know how it is. I pray you will find love again, someday, and that your heart will be mended. Well, unless the tigers rip it apart. I don't think there's anything you can do about that. Well, good. I suppose that is the lesser of the two evils.

Yes, the poems are getting a bit weird now, V. I'm totally not sleeping with them under my pillow or anything. Really, I'm not. It's weird, I thought we were through? Whatever, just don't show up at my house in the middle of the night and shout poetry at me from downstairs. I don't even have a balcony.

(Yes. I am open for any and all dates, really.)

Tent, maybe, but a building would be a bit strange. Yes, let us adjourn to my garden shed to take a dip in the pool. Then again, it would be sort of funny to open up a shed and expect gardening tools but instead be met with a pool. I don't think my mother is too keen on Peaches, unfortunately. Alas, I will just weep for the bird I can never be with. Smaller birds seem more sensible though.

I am free all summer, really. There's really nowhere to go save for Diagon Alley, so I'd be up for meeting there whenever you like. It seems like you are in the same boat of endless free time, so do you want to say this Saturday?

Love,

Zaira

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