lets go crazy till we see the sun [caleb]

[Julian Delaire]

Julian was maybe half excited and half dreading his best friend's arrival in his house. His mum was up in her room while he set the table with the delicious food she had prepared for both him and Caleb tonight, and part of him was excited to actually see his best friend, but the other part knew he was in for a talk about his recent activities. His recent activities with girls. Always a fun topic.

Not that he minded discussing girls with Caleb, but somehow, the topic of conversation would eventually move to Ainsley Rickett, and, well. He wasn't sure how much he wanted to tell Caleb, exactly. The afternoon they'd shared had been...private, for lack of a better word. It had just been the two of them for the most part, and as much as he loved Caleb, he didn't want to really give him every last detail of what they'd done.

And the same, of course, went for his night with Astraia Yaxley, though he rather suspected Caleb wouldn't want to hear much about that. Almost on cue, the fire blazed green and his best friend emerged from the flames, stumbling onto the carpet like he always did. Julian grinned instinctively and raised a hand to wave him over to the kitchen.

"Almost thought you were gonna miss my mum's cooking," he chided. "Which would have been a shame, because she made extra just for you."

[Caleb Blackwood]

Caleb stumbled through the fireplace into the Delaire living room, eyeing the carpet that he nearly tripped over every single time with a look of disdain, as if the universe and the particular patch of carpet was at fault somehow for almost making him fall whenever he came over to Julian’s. Brushing off the bit of Floo powder that had gotten stuck onto his khaki trousers, he stepped into the kitchen when Julian waved him over.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” he said by way of greeting, though he was already grinning, “I couldn’t care less about you, but I’ll have to tell your mum thanks for making extra food for me. What a sweetheart!” He propped himself up to sit on top of the counter opposite to the one Julian was leaning against, legs dangling in the air as he crossed his arms and gave his best friend a pointed look. “Oh, and just to lay down the ground rules - at the moment I don’t want any details of your recent escapade with Astraia Yaxley. All I want to make clear is that we should spend a moment recalling that although she was your first time having sex, she wasn’t your first kiss.”

[Julian Delaire]

Julian raised an eyebrow, entertained by Caleb's struggles with the carpet, at his best friend as he made himself entirely at home in the kitchen. He was wearing fucking khakis, the dork. Why was he friends with him again? 

"My mum loves you," he admitted, pushing himself off the counter he was leaning against and wandering around the table to where Caleb was seated. "God knows why." More amused than annoyed, he set both hands on either side of Caleb's body, smirking as he leaned in. "What if I told you Astraia was a better kisser?" he teased, knowing exactly how offended Caleb would be at the mere insinuation that Julian could have had a better kiss with someone else. The statement wasn't entirely true, but it wasn't entirely false either, and Julian was, if nothing else, a Slytherin. Caleb could deal with that, surely.

[Caleb Blackwood]

"Well, she should, as I'm clearly much better son material than you are. Plus, who doesn't love me? That's the real question," he replied lightly, smile never falling short even as Julian made his way over to him. He did let out a scoff, however, as he processed his words, shaking his head in disbelief at his best friend.

"That's complete shit and we both know it," he retorted, slightly annoyed and aware of Julian's hands on either side of his body but choosing to ignore that for the time being. Leaning forward slightly until their noses were almost touching, he added, "You wish she was a better kisser than me. If I was you, I would've wished the same, don't worry. It's such a pity, though, that your first time went to waste like that..." He trailed off, purposely suggestively, and refused to back away, practically breathing the same air as Julian just like they did when they shotgunned. Two could play this game.

[Julian Delaire]

"Addie Beaumont," Julian answered teasingly, shooting Caleb a smirk. "You know she signs all her letters with love? I don't want you to think you're special there, or anything." Truthfully, he was fairly certain Addie had actually liked Caleb in their earlier years at Hogwarts, but he'd never given it much notice because he'd never cared for Addie one way or the other, at least until Caleb developed a ridiculous crush on her himself. But he certainly wasn't going to tell him right this moment that he was pretty sure Addie would and could fall in love with him if he tried. No need to feed his ego.

"I'm being completely serious," he insisted, raising his head as Caleb invaded even more of his personal space than Julian had already done to him. "She was actually gentle and she tasted like strawberries instead of smoke and you know what, it was a pretty fucking nice first time." Normally, when he started throwing the word fuck around it was because he was annoyed, but this time it was purposely to get under Caleb's skin, which seemed to be working judging by how much Caleb was leaning in. "What," he began in challenge, grinning at him, "you think you could do better?"

[Caleb Blackwood]

“Don’t go there,” Caleb warned, tilting his head to the side as he considered Julian’s comment, “Besides, I’m sure she hasn’t signed off all her letters to you with love, and you can’t even claim she has, because some of the things she said about you after I told her about you and Astraia, mate, they were pure gold. She’s out for your blood now, I’m pretty sure. Speaking of, how do you manage to get all the girls that matter pissed off with us one way or another? It needs to stop.”

Caleb made a face at his best friend, very nearly rolling his eyes but deciding to play it cool instead. “Oh, please,” he replied, still not buying it, “Any time you use like strawberries as a describing factor is when I’ve known you’ve gone crazier than usual. Let’s not kid ourselves here, of course I could do better,” he went on, not taking Julian’s challenging tone lightly in the least - just because only one of them was a Slytherin didn’t mean that Caleb couldn’t be competitive and stubborn, especially when his kissing skills were concerned.

He did roll his eyes, then, unable to act casual for more than a few moments at a time, and leaned in ever so slightly to close the distance between them. He was pretty used to the feel of Julian’s lips against his at this point, as they’d accidentally kissed more times than they could count while shotgunning, and he never gave up an opportunity to tease Julian about this, either, as he never really pulled away. Yeah, so straight, Caleb thought teasingly, specifically when he felt Julian kiss him back. This ought to shut him up and wipe that grin off his face.

[Julian Delaire]

"You're right, I guess that makes me the special one for not getting the standard love signature," Julian smirked. He wasn't even remotely serious, but it was always good to take Caleb's ego down a few, if he could. "Also, this was totally your fault for telling Addie. How is it any of her business who I sleep with, again?" He had a pretty good guess as to why, but that would also involve admitting that Caleb may have been right about Ainsley needing to know because Ainsley might care and that was not a road Julian was willing to go down. Ainsley shouldn't care who he slept with because he couldn't let himself care who she might sleep with.

Julian opened his mouth to say something about how nice strawberries were when Caleb rather soundly cut him off by closing the miniscule gap between their lips. He might have said he was surprised, but he had practically goaded Caleb into it, so he only grinned into the kiss and deepened it just long enough to taste the chocolate Caleb must have eaten earlier -- it was a nice change from the smoke, he had to admit. And it was a lot different from kissing Astraia, who had been all soft curves and lip gloss beneath him. Caleb was much rougher and familiar and, in his own way, really nice to kiss.

He found himself a little out of breath when they parted, refusing to pull back all the way to give Caleb any space. He could practically taste the self-satisfied smirk on his best friend's lip lingering from their kiss. "You," he proclaimed with a roll of his eyes, "are so fucking territorial, it's ridiculous."

[Caleb Blackwood]

"Oh yeah, if the new definition of special is her wanting to knock your teeth out, then sure, by all means, you're the special one," Caleb retorted teasingly, refusing to let Julian get the better of him, even when it came to Addie. He sighed dramatically as Julian went on, nearly hitting his head against the wall behind him to demonstrate just how idiotic he thought his friend was being - he could practically hear his stupid thought process - but managed to refrain at the last moment, though he still shook his head slightly. "Mate, you are one fucked up individual," he responded half-seriously, "It is Addie's business and you know it, because it's Ainsley's business. And no matter how much you deny that, I won't let you forget it."

Caleb comfortably leaned into the kiss, pressing his lips against Julian's with ease, all the while thinking that this was an extremely fail-proof way of getting Julian to shut the hell up when nothing else seemed to work. Making a mental note of that fact, he chuckled softly when Julian pulled away, even though their faces were still incredibly close. One of his hands had absent-mindedly slipped up Julian's shirt as they'd been kissing, and he purposely left it there even after they broke apart, his fingers resting casually on the skin of Julian's abdomen. "And you," he remarked breathily, ignoring the way Julian rolled his eyes at him for what seemed like the thousandth time, "Are in deep denial, which is also ridiculous... Speaking of, we should probably talk about Ainsley, because, well, you know we're going to have to at some point."

[Julian Delaire]

"If it makes you feel better that she signs her letters to her brother the same way she does to you, then sure," Julian said agreeably, "say what you will, mate." He paused, knowing he was probably going to be digging himself a deeper hole with anything else he said, but kind of wanting to say it anyway - "Okay, but here's the thing. What happened between me and Astraia is between me and Astraia. It's not like she and Ainsley have anything to do with each other. I only told you because you're my best friend. It's no one's business but my own who I sleep with or don't."

Despite the self-righteous rant, it was getting rather hard to concentrate with Caleb's hand up his shirt and his equally-breathless voice. His touch was, somewhat surprisingly, ridiculously soft and warm on his bare skin. The thought of actually, properly talking about Ainsley, though, snapped him back to reality and he all but jumped apart from Caleb, his movements anxious as he shoved his hand out from underneath his shirt.

"Fine, you wanna talk?" he demanded, separating himself with a more decent distance from his friend. "Why don't you start? Tell me everything I need to know about my feelings about Ainsley, go for it."

[Caleb Blackwood]

Caleb scoffed, throwing Julian a disapproving glare, which was difficult to pull off because he was still half-grinning. "How do you know how she signs off her letters to her brother? Are you stalking her or something now?" He waved a hand in the air in brief annoyance at Julian's statement, as if what he said didn't even matter in the grand scheme of things, and replied, "Oh, whatever. If what happened between you and Astraia is so sacred and none of anyone else's business, then why the fuck did you write to me so smugly to gloat about it? If Ainsley doesn't have anything to do with Astraia, then seriously, neither do I, right? Why even divulge the secret to me, idiot? The best friends card is so irrelevant here. You say we're best friends only when it's convenient for you, so I'd appreciate it if you stopped that."

He laughed as Julian shoved him away, allowing both his hands to rest at his sides on the countertop. Caleb was more than used to Julian's rants and his antics whenever things didn't go precisely his way, as he'd had over five years of experience with the other boy now. If Julian thought he would let him off so easily, he was wrong. It was clear that he was trying to avoid being serious about talking about Ainsley in favor of being a dick, and that was nothing unexpected. Remaining on the counter, Caleb regarded his best friend with a fair amount of skepticism that was probably evident on his expression. "Okay, okay," he replied, though his teasing tone didn't slip away in the least, "You don't want to talk about Ainsley? That's fine. Just say so. But don't try to turn this around on me, because you know I could talk about her and all the reasons you're completely insane for not admitting that you fancy her forever. It's likely better if you don't give me the chance."

[Julian Delaire]

Julian shrugged dismissively. "Like I said, she signs her letters with love across the board, including to me before you got her pissed off at me. But that's not really what you want to talk about, clearly," he muttered, rather aggressively adjusting the silverware on the table. "I thought you might want to know that I finally had sex, seeing as you've only been teasing me about it for years. You're right, though. Obviously, I shouldn't have told my best friend that I lost my virginity so we could avoid this whole argument." He was going to add more about perhaps not just randomly coming over for a sleepover if they weren't going to call themselves best friends, but he stopped himself before he could, not wanting to get in another serious fight.

He knew Caleb didn't mean it, knew Caleb was only upset because he had for some stupid reason invested so much in the idea that Julian and Ainsley were meant to be together, and maybe, from his point of view as a best friend to both of them, it made sense. Maybe. But from where Julian was standing, he was pretty sure he could have sex with whoever he wanted. He and Ainsley had only spoken properly a couple of times before this summer. And she was pretty and he liked her, that much he could admit to himself, but they weren't anything. They'd never actually been anything.

Instead of replying properly, he rolled his eyes and glanced towards the hallway leading to his mother's room, expecting her to appear for dinner any moment now. "Fine," he began, but was interrupted mid-sentence, not by his mother, but by a very familiar owl outside their window. It was Ainsley's owl. Startled, he walked over and opened the window to let the owl in as he took the letter. It wasn't addressed to him, in fact, the name Caleb was written on top of the parchment in Ainsley's pretty - no, not pretty, he chided himself - handwriting.

Bemused, he passed the letter over to Caleb. "It's, uh, it's for you, mate," he said. "From Ainsley."

[Caleb Blackwood]

“That’s irrelevant,” Caleb replied lamely, although it very obviously wasn’t. He surveyed Julian’s treatment of the silverware on the table with one raised eyebrow, not bothering to comment on it, however, as he wanted to focus on the real issues at stake rather than delving into the smaller behavioral ones - theoretically, he could go on for a while about Julian’s attitude right to his face, he would try his best to hold his tongue here.

When Julian went on, though, Caleb found it difficult to refrain from pointing out his shortfalls. “You’re so - wow. Really, wow is all I can even say right now,” he said evenly, realizing that he was probably not making a great case but not caring anyway, because all he registered at the present moment was the way his best friend was acting, and how striking a balance between not getting into another real fight with him and calling him out was pretty damn difficult. He was interrupted, thankfully, by both Julian handing him a letter that was apparently from Ainsley and Julian’s mother finally emerging from her room.

Getting off the counter and snatching the letter from Julian, he read over it carefully, keeping a safe distance away from Julian so he wouldn’t be able to read it over his shoulder. His face fell immediately upon processing Ainsley’s words, as he knew her well enough that he could tell she was hurt and could practically hear her voice reprimanding him, and he took a deep breath, attempting to compose himself as he shoved the letter into his trouser pocket. He managed to shoot a semi-bright smile at Julian’s mother, only before he leaned over and whispered, “Congratulations, we’re both fucked,” into Julian’s ear in a serious tone. It was ridiculous, but he didn’t want to openly swear in front of Julian’s mother, because he respected her a lot. It was no fault of hers that her son was a colossal idiot.

Clearing his throat with Ainsley’s accusatory and angry letter still at the forefront of his mind, he smiled again at Julian’s mother, uttering a quick, “I’ll be back in a minute for dinner, just going to wash my hands,” to her and nothing more of an explanation to Julian. He moved towards the corridor, disregarding the sink in the kitchen that had clearly been next to him. He made his way by muscle memory to Julian’s bedroom without even asking him and stepped into it, going to search his desk for a quill and blank parchment he could write a reply to Ainsley with.

[Julian Delaire]

"Irrelevant," Julian scoffed, but didn't go any further, instead looking away from Caleb as he read the letter and greeting his mother with a kiss on the cheek. He chanced a glance over at his friend while his mum sat down at the table in time to see Caleb looking, for lack of a better word, devastated. He desperately wanted to go over and see what had happened, especially because he had the feeling it might have concerned him, as well, when Caleb looked up and shoved the letter back in his pocket, shielding it from Julian's gaze.

He was about to ask what the hell was going on when Caleb leaned over to him and bluntly informed him that they were, for some reason, fucked. Julian took a breath to compose himself as Caleb made an excuse and rushed out of the room. He glanced back at his mother who was smiling knowingly at him and sighed.

"I'm gonna go see what that's about," he muttered, walking over to kiss her forehead. "I'll be back, I promise I won't let your food go cold." Tossing her a smile over his shoulder, he headed out to confront Caleb, who most certainly had not gone to wash his hands. He found him inside his room writing hastily on a piece of parchment, presumably to Ainsley.

"You wanna tell me what's going on?" he asked from the doorway to his room, not stepping in to afford Caleb a modicum of privacy, despite the fact that it was his room. But his mother would have frowned on that, so he didn't.

[Caleb Blackwood]

"I mean, I could tell you what's going on, but I'm going to take a wild guess here and assume that you don't care," Caleb retorted, not even looking up from the parchment he was scribbling away on as he heard's Julian's voice from behind him. His tone was unusually icy, as Caleb typically didn't go for the whole sarcastic, apathetic vibe, leaving Julian to busy himself with that because one of them acting that way most of the time was more than enough. Now, however, he found himself having to bite his lip to keep from saying something worse, in reality wanting to get right up in Julian's face and repeat exactly what Ainsley had written, especially in the last paragraph of her letter, except he knew that that wouldn't do anyone any good.

Sighing irritatedly over his shoulder in Julian's direction, he finished writing his reply to Ainsley, genuinely feeling more apologetic to her than he could put into words. He then reached for a new piece of parchment to quickly write a letter to Addie as well. "I think Ainsley might be slightly upset," he told Julian when he finally turned around, holding both of the finished letters he'd written in one hand as he continued, rather levelly, "I also think I need to use your owl to send this other letter to Addie, if you'd be kind enough to let me do so." The rational part of him was aware that he should probably give Julian more details about what Ainsley had said in her letter that had prompted his hasty reaction rather than leave him hanging like this, but the other, more prominent part of him was content with letting Julian wonder about it for a few more moments. He deserved at least that much.

[Julian Delaire]

Julian closed his eyes, pressing his head against the doorframe at Caleb's words. He didn't want to fight. He didn't want to do this again. He definitely didn't want to learn he'd hurt Ainsley's feelings. And he didn't want to say anything stupid that would send them right back to square one. The problem with having a Slytherin temper was that it wasn't much better than a Gryffindor temper on the best of days, so he had to take several breaths to calm himself down before he replied.

"Fine," he said slowly, carefully, watching Caleb finish up both his letters. "You don't have to tell me. It's all right." It wasn't. But he was over fighting and he was over caring so much about what Caleb and Ainsley were writing to each other, no matter how much he desperately wanted to know. Jealousy had never gotten him anywhere, and he wasn't going to stick his nose where it didn't belong, either. If Caleb didn't want him to know, fine. He could deal with that.

"You can use my owl," he told him, nodding to the cage where his snowy owl was cheerfully eating her dinner. "I...I hope everything's all right," he finally managed, a little unsure of how else to phrase the sentiment of I hope Ainsley's not mad at me I hope I didn't fuck things up too much I hope she's okay. "With Ainsley, I mean." He wanted terribly to ask if she was upset with him but he figured if she was, Caleb would let him know sooner or later. Or else he'd write her himself tomorrow. Either way, he wasn't going to fight with his best friend, not again and not anymore.