Sebbie

[Roxanne Weasley]

Sebbie Webbie, 

My pretty girl. What do you want for your birthday? 

love,
Rox

[Sebastian Nott]

What is this?

Answer: this is malarkey. And tomfoolery. Of the very highest.

One does not simply ask Sebastian Nott what he wants for his birthday.

I like surprises. Surprises, I say! And it's quite distressing that you're asking me this so close to my birthday.

Sebbie Webbie x

PS I met your younger cousin and she agreed that everyone ought to wear mermaid costumes to your wedding.

[Roxanne Weasley]

This is me asking you what you want for your birthday.

So I repeat, what do you want pretty girl? I already have a good idea, but I want to know if i'm on the right path.

I promise your gift will be amazing, too, okay.

xoxox.

Roxie

PS. Lucy would have knocked your head off, so i'm guessing you met Lils and she'd never agree to that.

And wedding? Real funny.

[Sebastian Nott]

This is you engaging in utter tomfoolery and malarkey. Don't you know me well enough by now? How long have we been comrades? This is offensive. I am offended.

I object to being called a girl. You can get confirmation from a number of sources that I am not. And what do I want? Other than world peace, adoration, and a lifetime supply of fags? I don't know. Something sexy.

Sebbie x

PS aha! You're a master detective. It certainly was Lily, and she agreed and was utterly charmed by me. Thought I was fantastic.

And yes, wedding. I expect my cousin to pop the question any day now. I'd better be best man or I'll sue.

[Roxanne Weasley]

But pretty girl, you did not object in the slightest to being called a girl in my first owl. Why object now? You have to admit, girls are amazing. You should feel honoured.

We've been comrades in this game of life for about four years now and you're still a simpleton as beautiful as the day I first met you.

Something sexy? So a nice little negligee - do you like lace or silk? or both?

xoxo
Rox

PS: Lily Potter, charmed by you? I don't think so.

Stop trying to be funny. He's not proposing any time soon. has he talked to you about it?

[Sebastian Nott]

I was too shocked and appalled by the fact that you hadn't yet bought me a present. After all I've done for you! I used to say you were my favourite Weasley (aside from your Aunt Hermione, I presume you understand) but look what you've done to me. I'm very distressed. And I assure you that girls are my favourite thing in the world, aside from me. And I'm not a girl. Again, multiple sources can confirm.

I can't remember the day we met, in all honesty. I was a stunning eleven year old, though. I probably charmed your socks off. I bet you were all nervous on the train. Bless.

Both. On a blonde, preferably, if you can manage it. If you're talking about a negligee for me, you're going to have to return to the drawing board.

Seb x

PS she's a girl, isn't she? And she totally loves me. Bet she fancies me and all. And what's funny? I wouldn't joke about such a thing. You two are practically married anyways.

I repeat: I must be best man, or else I'm suing. Or just ruining the wedding in general. I'll sing at it. Properly leap on a table and do my rendition of any dodgy old ballad I can get my hands on. And despite the fact that I'm sure my singing voice is heavenly, it has been known to clear rooms.

Obviously everyone's just jealous and intimidated.

[Roxanne Weasley]

I bought you a gift finally, though! And all you've done for me? You mean giving me endless headaches? Please don't say any more about my Aunt Mione, just stay away from her. Stay away from my Aunt Fleur, too. And my mother and we'll be okay. No need to get your knickers in a knot either. I have no need to check those sources, though i'm pretty certain Ricky would love to list the ways she knows you're not a girl for me.

Sigh, you can't remember the day we met? I'm wounded Sebastian. I may just have to return your gift. I doubt you charmed my socks off. I thought boys were pretty disgusting at 11, still do.

But you'd look fab in a bright red nighty with lace. It'd bring out your eye color.

x
Rox

PS: You're insane. Lily isn't charmed too easily. She's a lot tougher than she looks. Best she'd rather push you off something than actually fancy you.

And you are joking and its not funny. We're not practically married, we don't even live together. He barely comes into my flat because he's afraid that Dom is going to stab him.

If I was getting married - which i'm not - i'd have you arrested before the wedding.

You're slightly delusional, but that's why I love you, sigh.

[Sebastian Nott]

I should think so. And I'm still miffed that it took you so long. You ought to have gotten me one weeks ago. Don't I buy you birthday presents? (Actually, I'm not sure I do. But that's your fault, really. You never alerted me to when your birthday is.) And no I have not. I refuse to stay away. I deeply admire your Aunt Hermione's genius, bravery, and class, and most of all the fact that she's still abominably sexy for a mother of two. I don't know much about your Aunt Fleur, but I have a strong feeling the same applies to her (Hermione will always be my favourite, however). Ricky is one of many.

Your socks were charmed off, young lady, and don't you forget it. Boys? Disgusting? How insulting. I'm a sensitive soul. And I have excellent hygiene.

I'd look fab in anything, but that's beside the point.

Sebbie xx

PS. Tough? She's toughish. In comparison to some of the girls I've had to deal with before, however (Rose, Dominique, Cassie, Eleanor, Devyn etc) she pales in comparison. And she thought I was excellent company, ta very much. I helped her out after some clumsy brute knocked coffee over her book. After all, I am a gentleman.

Of course he's not going to go into your flat if Dominique is there. Frankly, if he did, I'd be worried about him. That's basic health and safety. And if you two got married, obviously you wouldn't cram into the flat with those two headcases. Mum'd probably buy you a little cottage somewhere fancy. Or a swish flat in London. We Notts would have to decorate it, obviously, because you two can't be trusted with things like that. Plus, as Notts, we have superior decorating skills.

I'll let Scorpius know not to ask you then, to save him from being embarrassed when you say no. Actually, I might not, 'cause it'd knock him down a few pegs.

And I'd escape! Even from Azkaban itself! Nothing will stop me being at your wedding. I love weddings. Open bar, fancy dresses, dodgy dancing and a definite crowd of bitter singletons who all need a one-night romp to make themselves feel a bit better.