DEV

[Damien Malfoy]

Are you soliciting me?

-Dao

[Devyn Oberlin]

Not at all.

Devyn

[Damien Malfoy]

There's that denial again.

So - will your banging skills get us free food?

-Dao

[Devyn Oberlin]

I don't know, why don't you give banging Ricky Jordan a try and then let me know if it gets you any free food?

Devyn

[Damien Malfoy]

See that plan would work if she didn't slightly scare the hell out of me. And if she wanted me.
Plus, you've already banged nature boy.

-Dao

[Devyn Oberlin]

Absolutely priceless. I can't believe you would admit to both of those things. I'm saving that letter as proof of a counterpoint for the next time you claim that everyone apparently wants you.

You can't just utilize my sex life to your own benefit to get free food. That's unfair.

Devyn

[Damien Malfoy]

You never know, Jordan could want me. I just haven't asked her yet.

Hush up and let's go get free food. Don't act like you've never considered it.

-Dao

[Devyn Oberlin]

I doubt it.

Fine, but you should come over after we get food, because I don't have plans and my sister's being a bitch. I don't think she particularly likes you, so that'll just irritate her more.

Devyn

[Damien Malfoy]

I don't. I'm irresistible.

Fine, but no googly eyes at Scamander; I'd like to be able to eat.
She absolutely loves me; not irritated in the slightest by my beautiful face.

-Dao

[Devyn Oberlin]

We just discussed how it's unclear whether she wants you or not. Nice try, though.

Do you think we're going to get free food if I simply talk to him?

Please make a conscious effort to not flirt with her, for the sake of my sanity.

Devyn

[Damien Malfoy]

Don't be jealous because she can accurately - hypothetically speaking - show her feelings for me, but you have a hard time admitting you're truly in love with me. Sigh. There's that DE-NIAL again.

Fine, I don't want to see you making eyes at him. Don't need that in my head.

Awe, jealous?

-Dao

[Devyn Oberlin]

Fuck off, your arguments don't even make sense anymore.

Why, are you jealous?

It's just that I'd rather not see you getting laughed out of my house.

Devyn

[Damien Malfoy]

No, fuck you and your taint. I make perfect sense. Can't fault me if you're a tad slow.

Hahaha, you're the one who seems up in arms about your sister batting her lashes at me and me returning the look. We're both pretty damn hot. Hot people flirt.

Laughed at? By who?

[Devyn Oberlin]

Alright, continue to live in your perfect little bubble where you're the most intelligent and constantly right. I'll always be here to tell you that you're wrong. You're living on the false hope that you're better than me, and that's just not going to end well.

How do you know how Danni would react? Have you fucking chatted her up before? I don't think so. Keep it in your pants.

There's a good chance she'll laugh at you. Probably not but whatever

Devyn

[Damien Malfoy]

You're really sounding jealous there, Dev. It doesn't look good on you - envy that is. You wish you could be like me.

Flirting's harmless, well unless it yours and Scamander's case, I suppose. Unlike you, I always wear underwear. You should learn to keep your pants on.

I doubt it.

-Dao